Room 411

In the beginning

our love filled the playground with innocence,

carefree, running through the grass

towards the empty swing set. 

Our hands gripping the rusty metal chains

as we threw ourselves in the seat of the swing,

wasting no time, kicking our legs 

back and forth, momentum rising higher

and higher, determined to touch the sky. 

Our laughter roared amongst the wind,

in our face, sunshine in our smile

and the challenge grinning in our eyes 

to see if we could go higher.

And we did.

We soared in our love 

limitless, never bound by time

existing in spaces we created,

choosing each other for the moment

and forever…

Naive to the darkness that would seep out

when love sparkles less and chokes more,

leaving less air in lungs, shattering hearts 

as the mind confuses love for pain

and pain for love,

to endure, to stay

because marriage is ups and downs

beyond butterflies to fill the stomach.

But what is it worth

when peace is a stranger to the body, 

and the four walls of your home 

are painted in hues of gaslight and jealousy

the bricks built have hidden control and manipulation?

In the end

love filled the playground with heartbreak,

bittersweet, running through the trees

towards myself, half-conscious and dazed,

falling in nature’s arms, my hands digging 

deep within the rich black earth

The sunset on my back,

working to mend and rebuild the pieces 

left on the swing,

no more hanging around, 

inching forward without regret, 

freedom under my wings to dance with the wind 

raindrops from my eyes, sunshine still in my smile 

to feel happiness in the midst of failing.